122: Terrific Timing, Dr. Phil

At this very moment, I’m watching Dr. Phil. His guests…

“Twin teenage boys are out of control, and their parents want them to stop breaking the rules.”

They smoke pot and drink in the house. Often they argue and physically fight as they try to steal each others marijuana. The parents are suspicious of the friends that come in and out of the house. The boys smoke pot on a regular basis because…They like to do it.

The “Timeline of the Twins’ Behavior” is posted in the background, and all I see can see is: drugs, drugs, drugs, hallucinogenic mushrooms, vodka, synthetic pot, stealing, skipping school, and vandalism.

They have no respect for boundaries and no respect for authority but, as Dr. Phil points out,  these boys are intelligent and articulate. (And coincidentally they look a little bit like M. One twin even has his before military academy hairdo, while the other has his post military academy buzz.) I suppose I’m mesmerized by this show because it feels like I’m watching my boy; and my heart hurts a little bit at the moment.

Dr. Phil affirms that this has gotten “beyond the ability to fix in the home.” His suggestion is send them to a school similar to the military academy M attends.The parents also need to take a new, stronger approach. As parents, our role is “to ensure the well-being and safety” of our kids. He goes on to say on his website, “Intervening in a dangerous situation (like ones involving drugs, abuse, and truancy) might make your child dislike you, but it will also save his or her life.”

Dear Dr. Phil, you have extraordinary timing. Here I sit at my kitchen table…relieved. I’m relieved because we made the correct decision five months ago to send M to a very structured environment . I’d rather have him here with us, but it was the right thing to do for him. Thank you, J


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