25: Way Too Much String

The truth is, I gained all my weight back – and what does that have to do with M? Unfortunately, it has everything to do with him, and I probably need to work on the situation.

For several months last winter, I may have been turning a blind eye to trouble brewing in my teen’s social life. But I did it on purpose; you see, I was developing my new theory based on the plethora of books I was consuming and numerous conversations with seasoned parents of teenagers.

The books were telling me,
      …they need us to let them develop their own identity, thoughts, and opinions. They need us to give them a little independence, and we need to allow them to make their mistakes.  And then there’s this one…Some parents need to realize that their teen may not grow up to be exactly like them.  

Parents were telling me,
     …this is what they do; they experiment.  Didn’t you know kids who did that in high school?  And then there’s this one…It’s sometimes better if we can control it a little bit by giving them a “safe” place to do what they are going to do anyway.

I digested all of the advice, and decided that these teen years with M were going to be tough no matter what I did.  So, why not give my brain a break and take care of myself…He is going to be fine…Everybody goes through this. We live in a great community, and he goes to a great school.  Time to let my baby out of the nest a little bit.

     Well, he flew way to far, but I did lose 30 pounds.  While I had let that kite string out a little bit, he was nose-diving wildly throughout the atmosphere. (I love that kite string analogy my dear friend, S, shared with me on one of our Monday morning walks.)  So, he was enjoying the ride at the end of the long string, and I was enjoying getting into my old jeans.  So not worth it.
     I worry…I eat.  And I’ve been really worried about him lately.


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